Sunday, May 06, 2012


When I was in middle school, I lived in a horrifically small town, the kind of town that would be featured in a creepy Stephen King novel about weird people living in a small town.

One summer, in the river behind the telephone switching building that was on the east end of town, there was a dead snapping turtle. Rumor had it, this turtle was dead as a result of kids (not unlike us but perhaps a bit more sinister) inserting firecrackers into the orifices of said turtle, and then lighting the fuses. Now, as an adult I realize that a turtle may not sit still long enough to allow this to happen (turtles are slow, but they're not statues), and that turtle had probably died of natural causes. Then, young borderline hooligans such as ourselves wandered along the riverbanks (as tweens [though that word had yet to be coined] were wont to do in this pre-digital [before computers, iPods or interwebz] world of my wonder years) and found this turtle and it remained an object of fascination for a while. Every now & then someone would talk about going to poke the dead turtle.

No turtles were harmed in the writing of this blog post.
And that's where I'm at with this blog.

Every now & then I poke the dead turtle.

But I'll be back! Because my life is too complicated to live in just one plane (i.e., reality); I'll be back. Right after I go surf Pinterest & Awkward Penguin memes...


  1. 1. Guess what I came home to? Uh-huh. A very alive turtle. He's going to claw his way through his cardboard box tonight and bite off my toes to avenge my parenting style.

    2. I'm following your blog and not just since I met you! I had know idea YOU were Mari's virtual notebook. Um... if you were totally aware of this fact, just chalk it up to my dorkiness.

  2. 1. My turtle is alive & kicking! That's her picture in the post. She's Gamera, named after the Japanese monster movie turtle of the same name). Did you find a snapper? Those are nasty! But my dad said they make good soup, so there's that.

    2. I just realized that was you, that I knew you already from my vast list of almost 20 followers. Dorks, unite! :)

  3. I have a new phrase now "poke the dead turtle" I think I do that a lot! Appreciate your blog, it was great to see you at OWFI wish we could have chatted -

  4. Lisa, so great to see you too! I had a wonderful time at the conference but my only regret is not being able to talk to friends more. To balance that, I met some awesome new folks, so I guess that makes it a win! :)

  5. Don't stay gone too long...your posts still make me belly laugh...pretty much every time! ;)